This will be short. And maybe a bit scattered. Because I am not home. I am in South Carolina with family. And I have been up since 4:45am. It seems Little Girl is dealing with an ear infection, or is majorly teething, or is going through a growth spurt, or something. So I am beginning this brand new year in typical fashion: utterly wiped.

But I am also feeling very positive about 2012. Yesterday, the first day of the year, was really quite magical. It was Big Girl's fifth birthday. The weather was glorious and my girls were happy and, well, it was indeed a wonderful way to kick off the year. I took oodles of pictures with my new camera (my Christmas gift from Husband) and look forward to sharing many of them here. And, as promised, I will pony up a birthday letter for my eldest gal. I have so much to say to her, and to myself frankly, five years into this parenting thing.

So today. Today I just wanted to pop by and say hello. I wanted to tell you that I have been thinking a lot about what I want from this year. I have also been thinking about what I want this blog to look like, and feel like, going forward. And I thought I would share some of these thoughts with you.

This year, I want to be productive and purposeful in my productivity. I want to write books. Yes, plural. I know I can do this and I am going to stop making excuses about time and exhaustion and the plethora of babies that have come to rule my existence. I am going to write and edit and polish and submit and write some more because this is something I love and I will not put this part of me on hold because my current life is chaotic and complicated.

This year, I want to be more flexible and forgiving. I want to embrace the juggling act that is my existence with a sense of reasonableness... As long as I am writing words and spending quality time with my girls and my man and my friends... As long as I am reading good books and good blogs... As long as I am feeling life and laughter and love... As long as I am learning... I will know that I am indeed doing okay. Better than okay.

This year, I want this blog to reflect the three things that matter most to me, topically speaking. Life. Love. Learning.

Life. Philosophically speaking. Biologically speaking. This is what rivets me. How we choose to live. How we find health and happiness in our own lives. How we react to the ripple of our days.

Love. Parental love. Marital love. Love for friends, for work, for words. Love for stories, for places, for memories, for questions... Isn't love something we are all after?

Learning. Learning in school. Learning beyond school. Are we truly growing if we are not continuing to learn? And who are our teachers? Our colleagues, our kids, our struggles, our juggles. An academic and existential romantic, I hope this is a year of profound learning, personally and professionally.

Okay, signing off to soak up my last day at a fine family place. I smell bacon. And the girls are all awake now, PJ-clad, hair exquisitely mussed, beckoning. And my coffee? It's gone. Again. And I am off for a refill. And another good morning.

Do you have any thoughts on 2012? Nothing is too random, too big or too small. (One of my sisters told me she wants to start taking vitamins this year and also that she wants to "figure out her life.") How do you hope your blog (or life) evolves this year? Do you think it is possible to be both highly productive and genuinely self-forgiving at the same time?

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Tomorrow Is a New Year